The Crap Cutting Character Creator (Patent Pending)

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Let's begin, shall we?

First thing's first, you're going to need one of these if you don't already have one. Using a character sheet isn't absolutely necessary, but may your in-game god help you if you don't.

Step 1: Roll 'em

To find your six ability scores, roll four 6-sided dice and record the total of the highest three dice. Do this a total of six times. If you're a coward (like me), you may instead use these numbers if you don't want random scores: 15, 14, 13, 12, 10, 8.

Assign each number to an ability. These are strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma. Now, use the table below to determine your ability modifiers.

Score Modifier Score Modifier
1 -5 16-17 +3
2-3 -4 18-19 +4
4-5 -3 20-21 +5
6-7 -2 22-23 +6
8-9 -1 24-25 +7
10-11 +0 26-27 +8
12-13 +1 28-29 +9
14-15 +2 30 +10

Step 2: Who am I?

Let's choose your character's alignment first from the table below.

Lawful Good Neutral Good Chaotic Good
Lawful Neutral True Neutral Chaotic Neutral
Lawful Evil Neutral Evil Chaotic Evil

And now, a background. Skill proficiencies gained can be marked beside each skill in the "skill" section. Please keep in mind this is just the basics, please read the appropriate section in the Player's handbook for detailed information.

Background Features

Skill Proficiencies:

  • Insight
  • Religion


  • Two extra of your choice


  • A holy symbol (a gift to you when you entered the priesthood)
  • A prayer book or prayer wheel
  • 5 sticks of incense
  • vestments
  • A set of common clothes
  • A belt pouch containing 15 gp

Feature: Shelter of the Faithful (see pg. 127)


Skill Proficiencies:

  • Deception
  • Sleight of Hand

Tool Proficiencies:

  • Disguise kit
  • Forgery kit


  • A set of fine clothes
  • A disguise kit
  • Tools of the con of your choice (choose 1):
    • Ten stoppered bottles filled with colored liquid
    • A set of weighted dice
    • A deck of marked cards
    • A signet ring of an imaginary duke
  • A belt pouch containing 15 gp

Feature: False Identity (see pg. 128)


Skill Proficiencies:

  • Deception
  • Stealth

Tool Proficiencies:

  • One type of gaming set
  • Thieves' tools


  • A crowbar
  • A set of dark common clothes including a hood
  • A belt pouch containing 15 gp

One Criminal Specialty:

  • Blackmailer
  • Burglar
  • Enforcer
  • Fence
  • Highway robber
  • Hired killer
  • Pickpocket
  • Smuggler

Feature: Criminal Contact (see pg. 129)

Variant Criminal: Spy (see pg. 130)


Skill Proficiencies:

  • Acrobatics
  • Performance

Tool Proficiencies:

  • Disguise kit
  • One type of musical instrument


  • A musical instrument (one of your choice)
  • The favor of an admirer (love letter, lock of hair, or trinket)
  • A costume
  • A belt pouch containing 15 gp

Choose 1-3 routines to define your expertise as an entertainer:

  • Actor
  • Dancer
  • Fire-eater
  • Jester
  • Juggler
  • Instrumentalist
  • Poet
  • Singer
  • Storyteller
  • Tumbler

Feature: By Popular Demand (see pg. 130)

Variant Entertainer: Gladiator (see pg. 131)